why cant i stop thinking about last night? hmm maybe its cos i havent had such a good talk with someone in sucha long time...but i cant help thinking back when we were sitting down n talking n i always somehow found myself lost in her eyes...it felt weird actually...but not in a bad way...but more like a funny weird feeling...dont really know how to describe it to be honest...sigh...i just feel that im not really ready for anything romantic or what so ever...especially not so soon after her...but then again i dont think she was thinking about anything romantic either...bahh all i needed was a good chat with a friend n she was it...so lets just keep it as that aye...hah...

hah...today was i good day i must say...for one...i had macdonalds' breakfast! haha...well yeah then i went home drenched from the rain n plonked on the bed to watch the tele only to fall asleep...heh...but then regina had to call me n wake me up...hah..yup so i went down to orchard to meet her...well we bought tix for the island...n walked a bit since we had like 1.5 hrs to kill...we then decided to sit for a while in the basement foodcourt for a drink n chat more...the show was pretty good i must say...but a little too predictable for me...although regina liked it a lot...haha...well we werent hungry so we walked n talked even more...we walked from cine all the way down to forum n back before stopping at paragon for a gelato n we had rocher! it was good la! not as good as the original in melb...but pretty good i must admit...heh...then i heard the arti firing from the ndp n suggested that we go to esplanade to try to catch the fireworks...but by the time we got to raffles city...the crowd was dressed in red n coming into the station...so we realized that we missed the fireworks...bahh...so we decided to have a cuppa n chat in starbucks...but they were full so we ended up walking around raffles city n talked more...haha...it was like we never ran out of things to talk about...but we got bored n there wasnt really anything we could do...so we parted ways n went home...i was dead beat i must admit...but im dead happy cos i havent had such a great chat with someone in so long...n we laughed a lot cos we were just so lame n all joking with each other...i must say that i had a fantastic time...n i hope we'll do it again sometime soon cos i could really use some good company to blare out whatever's on my mind...ah well i need some sleep...

i wonder if im doing the right thing...i guess i should be as long as i dont charge into it blindly right? hmm...well i shall use my own judgement n see how things go...

i really dont need to be played...i really dont think i deserve to be treated this way...but most of all...u dont deserve me...bugger off.

greenlighters ...i say...we gotta do this some time man...i miss jamming n laughing our heads off at each other again...

i surrender...i give up...i lose...i dont know what else i can do...maybe i was the one doing all the dreaming n hoping when all along it was never meant to be? n that i was the one lost in my own world thinking everything is as i wished it to be? i dont know...really i dont...but all i know is that im some lost memory somewhere in that thing she calls her brain that is protected so darned well by some thick-ass material...there's only so much that i can do...n whatever i can do ive done...so here's my white flag that i hang upon the clouds that ive drifted on...

i wont bother u anymore...

8 hours...thats the total amount of sleep i had over friday n sat...shit man im damn shack now la...hah...but at least i had a fantastic weekend...so what the hey la...hahah...met ian limo n his classmate at paragon after i booked out...managed to catch a few hot chics at the "fashion show" before going to his house to jam a little...had dinner then we lan-ned the whole night away with his neighbour joining us too...we played lan from like 12 to 4 man! we played generals first...n i was getting my butt kicked left right n centre...then we played cs...n i just owned them all la really...we played some micro mini map called mini militia...n bloody hell is it mini i tell u...hah...but it was fun...i had 120 frags by the time we decided to change map...haha...limo n i raped his classmate n neighbour so much so that we played pistol fight to "even up" the game a little...but it didnt help much if u ask me...haha...then we changed to poolday n that was a kickass move man...sucha lovely map with such lovely weapons lying on the floor...man i was spoilt for choice as to which weapon to use la...i practically used every weapon at least once! grenades included please...haha...ok ok my head's beginning to swell...but it was a fun night to say the least cos we were laughing away at each other n all...we only realised how late it was when the lan shop owner told us he was closing n begged us to stop so he could go home...haha...knowing i had the mixed doubles to bowl on sat...i bought breakfast n cabbed home before sleeping at like 530 then waking up at 10...n it was a bloody pissing morning la really...but i shall save that for the next entry...cos im in camp now doing duty...which is a complete waste of my sunday...i could've been sleeping now n bowling later...bahh...owell...